It's a little uncomfortable for me to share so vulnerably over the Internet, but I felt quite prompted today to share my most recent glimpse of heaven in my life. I know we sense it from time to time when we see it in our loved ones, or something God does for us beyond our imagination.
For me, I see glimpses, when a loved one dies. I've had quite a few people dear to me in my life pass away. Just recently Jason's Grandpa passed away after living a long wonderful life. Around the time he passed away, I knew I was 5 weeks pregnant. At 10 weeks, we found out through an ultrasound that the baby had stopped developing at 5 weeks and could not detect a heart beat. I then had a miscarriage three days later.
In the midst of the roller coaster of emotions and hormones, God has been so close through prayers answered, people who have empathetically extended comfort and support, and just sensing His peace. In the midst of it all, I've stopped to think about what this looks like for my sweet little one. So I thought I would share my glimpse of heaven.
Even though we didn't know when our little one had entered the gates of heaven, I know Jesus was there. I know He took that baby in His arms. After loving all over that baby, He then passed her right to my Great Grandmother, Mammaw we liked to call her. Oh now if anyone is going to hog this baby in heaven it will be my Mammaw. I am sure she's already picking out the frilliest most beautiful outfits for that baby just like she did for me every Easter.
And then I think that baby has been held non-stop. I mean ya know how they say don't hold your baby too much you might spoil her...lots of spoiling going on. I am sure my Dad's sister Marlene has cradled her, and my Dad's Dad-Grandpa Keller too. I know Jason's Grandparents are so pleased to have a baby Pongratz to love all over too. And then there will be a baby cousin from my Dad's side of the family that this baby will play with. And many many more we know and may not even know. I believe it!!!
I am sure they are sharing stories of his/her Daddy and Mommy and telling how much we miss them all. So until the day that I get to hold my sweet little one in my arms, I'll rest with knowing she/he's in the BEST HANDS in my glimpse of heaven.
14 comments:
We do have such a wonderful hope that someday we will get to hold our babies that are waiting for us. Thanks for sharing your heart. We are so blessed. Grandma Lorla
Oh -- I wish I knew what was going on. Please let me know if you need any help at all. I love you and your family and of course you are lifted up in my prayers.
Shan,
Sadly we know your feelings all to well. Knowing God and knowing His love for us gives us peace in the knowledge of the happiness that is now surronding our gifts that are now resting with Him. My prayers are with you and JP. Thanks for sharing your heart. As hard as it is for you to open up, it's so rewarding to many!
You are such a strong woman of faith Shan Shan! I know you're right - that God and all the other family members you have up in heaven are taking better care of her/him than we could ever do down here in this earthly place. It's hard not knowing the "whys" but God has a plan. I will continue to pray for your healing, peace, comfort and strength! Love ya girl!!!
I'm so sorry for your lose. And I pray God is comforting you through this very difficult time. Thank you for sharing your heart and your continued trust in God in the midst of the storm. I have a great online friend named Angie Smith at http://audreycaroline.blogspot.com/ I pray her story will encourage you! Love, Becky and the Vang Family :)
Thanks for sharing this. It's such a great perspective and it made me so excited for our family reunion when we get to heaven. I can't wait to see this little baby in your arms when we get there! Love you!
Shannon,
I can only imagine how much fun your little one is having with our Rachel and Isabella. I didn't really know what it meant to yearn for heaven until I lost my babies.
We love you and Jason very much. You have such a special place in our hearts and we are praying daily for you to feel God's love, His peace, and comfort during this time.
Love,
Bob and Mai Xia
I have been praying for you. Can't wait to see you at MMO soon, I'm so glad you shared.
braeden gives soph kisses
I'm so sorry. This can be really hard and I am praying for you.
Peace and prayers today....
and smiles at MawMaw hogging the little baby....
So very sorry to hear about the baby. We too lost Eli's twin at 6/7 wks. Won't it just be wonderful to see that sweet face someday! Love and prayers to you and Jason.
You know that my prayers are continuously with you. I actually smiled a little when I read this because I know that my Dad was there with open arms too. He was the lover in our family, and I know he would have been a wonderful grandfather here on earth. But...now he is in heaven...with your little one by his side. What a beautiful place it must be...I love you Shannon!
Thank you for sharing your heart. I continue to pray for your healing and comfort. There is comfort in knowing that we will see our loved ones again and that God has a master plan for us.
Love ya
Liz
We have been praying for you and am praising the Lord for the comfort He is giving you! WE love you so much!
The Hudson
Thanks for sharing your beautiful heart!! I love you so much! I am praying for you!
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